Brangelina: A PERFECT Union


Fuck off, Duchess Kate,
the wedding of the CENTURY
has arrived!

Brangelina, our celebrity liaisons
to the heavens have joined their golden souls
into a voltron of pure aspiration.

It has been reported
that the ceremony took place
inside of an orb of pure light.

The bride, dressed in a garment
each beholder witnessed as an image
of pure aesthetic perfection,

descended from a ray of light
to join her groom, whose expression
was of such love that those in attendance

were said to be cured of all cancers
and finally understand the nature of God.
The children, each a being of self-possession,

were said to demonstrate such a concept
of who they were and would always be
throughout the stream of time,

that guests reached self-actualization
and Nirvana during the course
of the 1 hour and 14 minute ceremony.

So, peons, let us purchase our new bible,
in drugstores near us,
the current issue of People,

and stare at the face of
wealth success cosmopolitan empathetic
beauty taste manifestation,

and, since this is America,
god damn it, we’ll sit waiting
for our own perfection to arrive.

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